2023 Author: Jake Johnson | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-24 23:11
When we stop to think about the way we function, we are most likely surprised by the need to have most aspects of our lives under control. Thus, when something does not turn out as we want or expect, a wave of frustration and disappointment invades us. It is normal to have little quirks that provide us with security or help us optimize resources or time.
However, if these obsessions escalate to the point of becoming obsessions, then they will negatively influence the experience. Situations of crisis or social, economic or personal instability can trigger the sharpening of the need to control everything to minimize the phenomenon of uncertainty. Surely someone close to you comes to mind who does not stop telling everyone around him what to do, how to do it, preventing the other from acting autonomously and thus generating a dependency that forces them to remain under the protection of the controller.
Fortunately, there is always time to abandon the sick control to be able to live more relaxed and enjoy small pleasures. To do this, it will be necessary to acquire a certain personal security that will favor the acceptance of failure and face it with he althy levels of fear.
We have to accept the impossibility of controlling everything and focus on what is in ourfield of influence. In this way, we will save ourselves many unnecessary worries and headaches. Therefore, learn to accept what you cannot control to avoid wasting energy that you can spend on what you can change.
Knowing the motivations that cause fear or anxiety is useful to gather information about what, how, when and why situations that trigger the need for extreme control occur.
The negative thoughts that are generated are inevitable but also manageable. Having resources or skills for this purpose will favor learning through mistakes and generate new opportunities.
Don't want to do it all yourself. Relies on the abilities of others and delegates functions and tasks. In this way, you will be able to download psychologically and your stress level will decrease, which will make you calmer and open to new challenges.
Train your flexibility. Don't plan everything down to the last detail. Leave room for improvisation and change of course if circumstances so require. Learn to prioritize, putting aside activities that are not urgent without adding another degree of anxiety.
In short, you don't want to control everything, or be constantly controlled. Drop unnecessary weight to have a fuller and broader view of life, of your life. It is essential to differentiate and specify what deserves to be controlled because it will result in a more or less certain benefit and to spend energy on it. Equally,once you decide to stop controlling something, don't look back or stay vigilant or expectant. Just let it happen and flow naturally and as events unfold the course will be redrawn and decisions made again.